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To go out of the country is a luxury to me. If I ever go on a trip, it is most likely in Virginia or Florida. In effect, going to Guatemala already excites me. I love exploring new things and going to new places. I do realize that this isn't exactly a vacation, but I’m still excited about going somewhere new. I also realize the experience won’t necessarily be fun or exciting most of the time. So why do I want to go?
I honestly don’t really know. I just have this gut feeling that I need to go. Do I feel like resisting that feeling? No. I’m actually quite excited. Excited that I’m going to be sleeping on the floor, working every day, and developing a one-on-one relationship with chicken? Or perhaps meeting people I’ll have a great trouble talking to? Maybe it's the reason behind why I’m going; God. I’m doing it for God. Maybe that's why I’m excited; this is the most I’ve ever done for spiritual purposes. I get to be God’s little helper for awhile. Other than the free chickens, that must be it.
What am I anxious about? Well, I’m not the best sleeper, and sleeping on the floor definitely doesn't help. I have a weak stomach, and often times trying new things doesn’t end well. I’m prone to getting migraines with vertigo during stressful times, which often lasts for 2-4 days, and that would totally kill my experience if that were to happen. But most of all, I’m scared I might offend their culture accidentally. Even reading a book that seems as big as War on Peace, I’m not very confident I know their culture too well. I do feel I know more now that I read that book, but enough? I’m not so sure on that. What if I do something extremely wrong of their culture, and then the entire community hates me? That wouldn’t end well at all. I just have to try my best and trust God & my leaders to ensure I don't do anything offensive to them.
Overall, I am excited about this trip and I don’t stress that much over my anxieties of this trip. I can’t wait to see what God has in store for me for this trip and who I will come out as. Though I will be in a foreign place I still very much look forward to going and I hope it will be a life-changer.
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